HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
I woke up under a house in Key West
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