we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
