I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
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