Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize
