I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
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