i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
