every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Randomize