Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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