3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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