I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
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