Three words: puerto rican gang bang
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Randomize