We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize
