I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
