I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize