the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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