just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
