Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
