? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
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