bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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