chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
no. you can't hotbox the world.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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