how can u be prego again
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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