And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Randomize