i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Randomize