But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
