I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
