So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
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