i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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