Jerry, you need to find god
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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