erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
