Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
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