well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
