Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Randomize