it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
You were trust falling into bushes
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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