Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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