if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
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