um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
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