So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
