if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
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