remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Randomize
