she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
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He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
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I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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