playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize