So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
