it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
