im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
Please, let me fuck your mom
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
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