quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
