You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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