please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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