Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
