And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Randomize
