im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
